I JUST CALL IT HOME
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Thursday, April 22, 2010
The Law of the Garbage Truck
One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport. We were
driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a
parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his
brakes, skidded, and missed the other car by just inches. The driver of
the other car whipped his head around, started yelling at us, and
flipped us the bird. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy.
And I mean, he was really friendly. So I asked, "Why did you just do
that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital."
This is when my taxi driver taught me what I now call, 'The Law of the
Garbage Truck.' He explained that many people are like garbage trucks.
They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and
full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to
dump it and sometimes they'll dump it on you. Don't take it personally.
Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Don't take their garbage
and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the streets.
The bottom line is that successful people do not let garbage trucks take
over their day. Life's too short to wake up in the morning with
regrets, so......Love the people who treat you right. Pray for the ones
who don't. Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how
you take it.
Have a garbage-free day!!!
driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a
parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his
brakes, skidded, and missed the other car by just inches. The driver of
the other car whipped his head around, started yelling at us, and
flipped us the bird. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy.
And I mean, he was really friendly. So I asked, "Why did you just do
that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital."
This is when my taxi driver taught me what I now call, 'The Law of the
Garbage Truck.' He explained that many people are like garbage trucks.
They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and
full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to
dump it and sometimes they'll dump it on you. Don't take it personally.
Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Don't take their garbage
and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the streets.
The bottom line is that successful people do not let garbage trucks take
over their day. Life's too short to wake up in the morning with
regrets, so......Love the people who treat you right. Pray for the ones
who don't. Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how
you take it.
Have a garbage-free day!!!
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Interesting bits of worthless trivia. (Except about Guam)
The World Is Nuts
In Lebanon , men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.
(Like THAT makes sense.)
In Bahrain , a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.
(Do they look different reversed?)
Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a
corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.
(A brick?)
The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.
(Much worse than 'going blind!')
There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the
privilege of having sex for the first time
Reason:
under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to
marry.
(Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)
In Hong Kong , a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands.
The husband's illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.
(Ah! Justice!)
Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool , England - but only in tropical fish stores.
(But of course!)
In Cali , Colombia , a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.
(Makes one shudder at the thought.)
In Santa Cruz , Bolivia , it is illegal for a man to have
sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.
(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had
to pass this law?)
In Maryland , it is illegal to sell condoms from vending , machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only 'in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the
premises.'
(Is this a great country or what?Well, not as great
as Guam !)
Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
(Who volunteers for these tests?)
The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30
times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.(From drinking little bottles of?)
(Did our government pay for this research??)
Butterflies taste with their feet. (Ah, geez.)
An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.(I know some
people like that.)
Starfish don't have brains.
(I know some people like that, too.)
And, the best for last
Turtles can breathe through their butts.
(And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!)
Thank you all for reading this, if you need to reach me in the future I will be in Guam !
The World Is Nuts
In Lebanon , men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.
(Like THAT makes sense.)
In Bahrain , a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.
(Do they look different reversed?)
Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a
corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.
(A brick?)
The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.
(Much worse than 'going blind!')
There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the
privilege of having sex for the first time
Reason:
under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to
marry.
(Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)
In Hong Kong , a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands.
The husband's illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.
(Ah! Justice!)
Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool , England - but only in tropical fish stores.
(But of course!)
In Cali , Colombia , a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.
(Makes one shudder at the thought.)
In Santa Cruz , Bolivia , it is illegal for a man to have
sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.
(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had
to pass this law?)
In Maryland , it is illegal to sell condoms from vending , machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only 'in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the
premises.'
(Is this a great country or what?Well, not as great
as Guam !)
Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
(Who volunteers for these tests?)
The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30
times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.(From drinking little bottles of?)
(Did our government pay for this research??)
Butterflies taste with their feet. (Ah, geez.)
An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.(I know some
people like that.)
Starfish don't have brains.
(I know some people like that, too.)
And, the best for last
Turtles can breathe through their butts.
(And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!)
Thank you all for reading this, if you need to reach me in the future I will be in Guam !
Friday, April 16, 2010
Monday, April 5, 2010
Old Farmer's Advice
Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong.
Keep skunks and bankers at a distance.
Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.
A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.
Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.
Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.
Forgive your enemies; it messes up their heads.
Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.
It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.
You cannot unsay a cruel word.
Every path has a few puddles.
When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.
The best sermons are lived, not preached.
Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway.
Don 't judge folks by their relatives.
Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
Live a good, honorable life.. Then when you get older and think back, you'll
enjoy it a second time.
Don 't interfere with somethin' that ain't bothering you none.
Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a Rain dance.
If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.
The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you.
from the mirror every mornin'
Always drink upstream from the herd.
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad .
judgment
Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.
If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody
else's dog around..
Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God
Don't pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight,
he'll just kill you.
And,
When you quit laughing, you quit living………. Now laugh!!
Keep skunks and bankers at a distance.
Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.
A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.
Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.
Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.
Forgive your enemies; it messes up their heads.
Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.
It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.
You cannot unsay a cruel word.
Every path has a few puddles.
When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.
The best sermons are lived, not preached.
Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway.
Don 't judge folks by their relatives.
Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
Live a good, honorable life.. Then when you get older and think back, you'll
enjoy it a second time.
Don 't interfere with somethin' that ain't bothering you none.
Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a Rain dance.
If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.
The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you.
from the mirror every mornin'
Always drink upstream from the herd.
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad .
judgment
Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.
If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody
else's dog around..
Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God
Don't pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight,
he'll just kill you.
And,
When you quit laughing, you quit living………. Now laugh!!
Saturday, April 3, 2010
SEED OF THOUGHT
LIFE in general is 10% of what you know and 90% of how you handle it.Made me think of all types of issues that I personally have encountered in these 75 years. I have to agree with who ever made this statement I feel this to be 100% true.When I encounter anything I have a habit of trying to go back to the seed of that perticular thought,or action.Many time I fall short of reaching that point.Why I do this is that I believe in (cause and effect) and how each indiuvidal proceives and handles an issue or action has an effect on others.
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